Just For Today – the passage of time

‘Time is an ever flowing river of life’

It was my mothers anniversary last week, she has been gone for 8 years. I can’t believe it has been that long, it seems like only yesterday that I watched her leave this earthly plane. I was sat there thinking about her last week and wondering where does all the time go. It passes us by and we barely notice.

It is funny really my life has changed so much in the last 8 years. I have become more awakened to myself, which has meant that I have gained more insight and knowledge. Insight and knowledge not just about me but about my mother and how so alike we are and I never realised that.

At her funeral I was talking to my mothers sister, we talked about my mother, and we talked about me and why I was such a free spirit and nomadic – and the reason was that my great grandmother was a Romany Gypsy. I never knew that information, my mother had never mentioned that to me. But it did provide a piece of my ancestral history puzzle.

As the years have gone by since her death I have learned more about my mother, who she was and why she behaved a certain way. She was always frustrated in her life, she was always trying to work it out, she was always thinking. She would sit for hours in the kitchen looking out of the window thinking. I believe she was a healer like me and she just couldn’t work it out. She was a very spiritual person, she believed in our creator and she had no fear of death. She knew about life and this reality, but kept it to herself. Her life wasn’t easy and she was sad for most of it. My great sadness is that I wasn’t so awake as I am now when she was alive. I could have talked to her about things, and she would have known that I knew what she was going through because I have gone through the same things.

The passage of time is a great teacher if we pay attention. Time waits for no man as they say. But the passage of time allows us to reflect on the past and see the things more clearly that we didn’t see before. That is certainly true with regards to my mum. The understanding I have of her now helps me to see and understand myself just a little bit more.

Being an Energy Healer

‘When I am my authentic self, my world makes sense’

I believe I was born a Healer, it is definitely my life purpose, my reason for being born on this earth at this time. To bring sunshine and light into the world, and raise the consciousness of others. I can see now, how being that little girl of 4 years of age, who used to sneak out of the house, and go ‘walking and talking’, knew what she was doing and why she was here. She was full of light and purpose, and that is when it all began.

Being an Energy Healer, is not about self, but about being of service to others. To be a channel of loving healing energy. To be a trusted friend, a confidant, and above all to be authentic, honest and true.

I think there is often a misconception about what an Energy Healer, can and can’t do. We do not and cannot heal. We act as channels, that allows loving healing energy to flow through our bodies, and then we pass that energy onto our clients, by using our hands, on or above their body, and our minds. We are the messengers not the message. Once the client receives the energy from the Healer, our jobs as Healers is complete. The clients body decides, along with God/The Universe, or whatever you may wish to call the Life Force Energy, what to do with the loving healing energy, and where in the body that energy goes.

When I am preparing for a healing session with a client. I set an intention that I wish to be the best possible channel to receive the healing energy, and that I may pass it onto my client, in a loving and respectful way. I call in my guides and healing energies. And I ask that my healing space is surrounded and bathed in protection and love. I also ask if the guides and the passed love ones of the person who is going to be having a healing session, wish to assist me.

When the session begins, my client will lay fully clothed on a massage type table, and I cover them with a blanket, if they wish. It is always my intention that my client feels comfortable and safe. I am a Healer that is very intuitive, and empathetic, and I receive guidance that is clear and precise. No two healing sessions are alike. The healing session is geared around the individual and what they need. Although I completed my Reiki 1 and Reiki 2 training many years ago. The energy that I channel now, is via my guides and energies of light. The Reiki healing training was a stepping stone to the Healer that I am now. And when you really think about it, Reiki is just a word, the healing energies come from God/The Universe, or whatever you identify as Life Force Energy.

A healing session really is a beautiful experience. We all have, busy lives, so it is a wonderful stress reliever. It promotes and aids healing in your body. It can also create a really moving and spiritual experience, where you connect to yourself and the universe. And generally it promotes a sense of well being.

I am always guided by spirit to which part of my clients body they want me to work on. I don’t have any set routine. Spirit guides me and I respond. I also feel the energies that are working with me, and I find that very comforting to know that I/we are not alone. The session generally lasts about an hour, but I don’t clock watch. The client is given the time they need. And I have found that clients really appreciate not being rushed. Generally energy healing and counselling, go hand in hand. When clients come to see me for a healing session, they always want to chat, about their lives and the difficulties they are having. So most healing sessions have both elements, a healing session and counselling.

Although most of my healing sessions are conducted in a healing space, many times they can happen when I am out and about. Guidance can come to me from spirit, at different times and in different settings. I could be out walking in nature, and I am called to comfort someone who has lost their dog. I have been on a ferry travelling, when I have been asked to give a healing session to a lady suffering from Multiple Sclerosis. That was very interesting, finding the Captain of the ship, and explaining to him why I needed a cabin, so that I could conduct a healing session for this lady. I have also been called upon to help a man, again on a ferry, to help him with his life purpose. Life as an Energy Healer is never dull. It is extremely rewarding, and I always feel privileged to be of service to others. Part of being an Energy Healer has meant that I have also learnt to embrace my uniqueness and difference.

From the beginning – Part 3

‘If I open my eyes to the Truth, all I will see is the Truth’

My Dad, and Me, with Ben

A few weeks before Kieran and I moved to Keswick, I went up there for a few days to secure a job and somewhere for us to live. Keswick is a place where long term accommodation isn’t so easy to find. So I decided to find accommodation and a job in Penrith which is 18 miles away. And then once living in Penrith, I would be able to make plans for us to move to Keswick. Because living locally made it a lot easier to find the illusive accommodation in Keswick, than trying to do it 200 miles away in Nottingham. I found a job in a pub, as a chef. I had taken various catering courses in Nottingham, which came in handy when I was looking for a job. I also managed to secure a small flat for us to live in. So with the job and the flat in place, we were able to move a few weeks later.

While we were waiting to move, I had a phone call from the landlady of the flat I was going to rent. It wasn’t available anymore, but she assured me she had another place that was suitable for us to move into. So I accepted it without seeing it. My brother drove us to Penrith with our belongings. When I got to see the flat that the landlady had assured me was a suitable place to bring up a child, it was anything but suitable. So I couldn’t take it. So now our plans were in chaos. I decided that Kieran and I would stay the weekend in Keswick, so I could think about what to do. I decided we had to return to Nottingham, we didn’t have anywhere to live. So the next morning we left the B&B that we had been staying in, and made our way to the bus station, to get the bus to Penrith, then the train back to Nottingham. As we were walking through the town, I noticed a small shop was open, selling newspapers and sweets. So I bought myself the local newspaper ‘The Keswick Reminder’, and some sweets for Kieran for the journey. As we were walking I flipped the paper over onto the back page, and there in black letters was ‘Room For Rent’. So I phoned the number, and explained my situation. And after viewing the room, a few hours later, we had somewhere to live. I said a silent ‘thank you’ to the universe for helping me and my son. I quickly found a job in Keswick, and so our life there had begun.

It wasn’t easy for both of us in the beginning. It was lonely and uncomfortable. We didn’t know anyone. But slowly as time went on we settled into life there. We both made friends, and we enjoyed the lovely walks and the wonderful nature, that this beautiful town had to offer. A few months after we moved to Keswick, I rented a lovely cottage in Portinscale, and went to work for a local hotel as a Pastry Chef.

I loved my job at the hotel, I really had a flair for breads, cakes, and desserts. I was still struggling with the anxiety and the confusion, but did my best to hide it. When I was on my own I would crumble. I knew there was something I needed to remember but I didn’t know what it was. Things were going really well for Kieran. A local neighbour had asked him if he wanted to help her with her dogs and small holding, where she had horses and pigs. And as it turned out he was a real natural around horses. And so at the age of 10, he decided he wanted to be a Vet.

Kieran

We lived in the cottage for a few years, then we were offered accommodation that was permanent. Kieran was excelling at school, and had started playing rugby, which he loved. We moved into our new flat, that was only a short walk away from Keswick town. So life was fairly settled. It still had it’s moments of loneliness, confusion and anxiety. But I was happy because my son was doing well, he was working towards his dream to become a vet, which I totally supported him in.

In 2004, I saw an advert for a job in a local shop called ‘The Rock Shop’. It sold crystals, fossils, books, gemstones, and jewellery. I applied for the job and got it. I didn’t realise the impact that this job was going to have on me. Nothing was going to be the same again. It was a very soothing place to work. I learnt about rocks and crystals, which I enjoyed. I got to chat a lot with the customers, it was a very friendly place. But something weird started to happen. Random people would come into the shop and tell me I was a Healer, I insisted I wasn’t. I didn’t even know what being a ‘Healer’ even meant. One day this beautiful woman came into the shop, I think she was Italian. She was just looking at me and smiling, and she said ‘You are Healer’, I said ‘No I am not’, she said ‘Yes you are, and it is time you accepted it’, and then she left the shop.

Over the next few months I read about what an Energy Healer was, and I was adamant I wasn’t one, and if I was I didn’t want anything to do with it. By now it was early 2005, and I had an uneasy feeling that my Dad was going to die. I don’t know why I felt that, I just had a knowing that this would be his last year on this earth. He was a very keen gardener, and I just had this feeling that I wanted to send him flower seeds, so he could plant them in his garden. So week after week I would send him a few packets of seeds. I went to visit him in June for a few weeks, and the garden was just over flowing in beautiful flowers, from the seeds I had sent him. My Mum said the garden had never looked so lovely, and that made me happy. I was glad that I had acted on my intuition to send my Dad all those seeds. He died on New Years Eve 2005.

In early January 2006, I was at work, when this man and his wife came into the shop (Ron and Marilyn). He stood there looking at me, and I thought ‘Oh no not this again’. He told me ‘I was a Healer’, and he asked me to turn around so my back was facing him. He put his hand on the middle of my spine, but not touching my skin, and said ‘ Wow, you are a very strong Healer’, he called his wife over and said ‘ Marilyn, come and feel this’, and she said ‘Oh my gosh’. I talked with Ron and Marilyn for some time about being a Energy Healer, and about doing a Reiki 1 & 2 course. I promised them that I would take the courses. I still didn’t believe I was a Healer, but I thought I will do the Reiki 1 course, and nothing will happen, and I can then tell anyone who mentions that I am a Healer that they were wrong all along. How wrong I was, I was about to turn my whole life upside down, and I didn’t even know it ………….

My Dad and Kieran

From the beginning – Part 2

‘I may not know where I am going, but I will know when I get there’

Me aged 8

After leaving school I had an appointment with the careers service. I remember the day very clearly. I opened the door to the career services waiting room, to find the room was packed with other people of a similar age, I was horrified that I had to go in there and wait till my name was called. I was so shy, and was so painfully aware of everyone’s energy. I scanned the room looking for a seat, after spotting one, I quickly sat down. I soon realised my mistake, I had sat next to a couple of girls, and they proceeded to make fun of me for the next 30 minutes or so until my name was called. At the time it was fashionable to wear long dangle type earrings, and I had decided to wear them that day, and the two girls had thought it was funny to make fun of them and me for wearing them, I was relieved when my name was finally called, and I decided I would never go back to that place again.

The careers lady, asked me ‘what I wanted to do for a job’, I said ‘ I like talking to people’. During my last year at school we had work experience, and I had gone to work in a local Travel Agents. The careers lady said the Travel Agents were looking for someone, so she rang them up, and they remembered me from my work experience with them, and they offered me a job, so the following Monday, I was employed. I enjoyed working at the Travel Agents, I got to talk all day, to customers who were in a happy mood because they were booking their annual holiday.

Although I was born in Ireland, I was brought up in Nottingham, UK. The Travel Agents was located in a place called Bulwell, it was a lively place, and it had a local market three times a week. There were three of us that worked in the Travel Agents, the Manager, a Booking Clerk, and me the Junior Booking Clerk. It was a really fun place to work. The Managers Father, would bring us cream cakes every Friday, which was lovely. Because I was young and naive, I always got practical jokes played on me. Once I was sent to the local hardware shop for some ‘sky hooks’, and off I went, feeling all confident and asked the shopkeeper for the ‘sky hooks’, he burst out laughing, along with the other staff, but I still didn’t get what the joke was. I went back to work, confused, until I saw the faces of my co workers, they were laughing, and it suddenly dawned on me, what they had done, and I just cracked up laughing too.

I had various office jobs up until the age of 20. Then I left Nottingham and went to London to work as a nanny. It was an exciting job, with a lovely family. They had two children, a girl, and a boy, and I really enjoyed my time looking after them. On my first day at work, when the children were at school, there was a knock at the door. I open the door to a very tall, dark, and handsome man, he said ‘He was Bob the Builder’, and proceeded to walk straight past me into the house. I thought ‘Gosh, what an arrogant man’, I didn’t like him at first, but he came to the house everyday over the course of a week or so, to do building work on the house, and everyday I would make him tea, and we would talk. Then he asked me if I would like to go out with him and his friends one evening. So he came to pick me up, and his friends were waiting outside in the car. Bob gets into the car, and there is no room for me, so I have to sit on his lap, I later found out that he orchestrated the not being enough room for me in the car, so I would’ have to’ sit on his lap.

We moved in together after a few months, we were both 20, young and inexperienced, we got on very well, and we did make each other laugh a lot. I was really starting to struggle with life, I felt so confused, I felt so different from everyone else, I wanted to be like everyone else and I couldn’t understand why I wasn’t. I spent so much time walking around London, miles and miles. I would sit outside cafes watching people, trying to work it out, trying to remember, I was in a desperate place, but I hid what I was going through from everyone. When I was helping someone, or talking to them, I always felt happy, that part of my life made sense. I was really missing Nottingham, so Bob and I moved to Nottingham, and a year later our son Kieran was born. Within three months of Kieran’s birth, Bob had left and I was now a single parent, and we never saw him again. I was 24, I had a new baby, a dog called Benson, and a cat called Squegy, I wasn’t about to fall apart, I made a conscious decision to be the best mother I could, and do the best for my son. We were a lovely small family, and we had each other. I was very blessed, because Kieran turned out to be a lovely happy child, and we had a really lovely Mother and Son relationship.

As the years rolled on, I realised that I was a woman that very much listened to my intuition, my inner voice, I was able to read people, I knew if they were lying, and I knew things, I had an inner knowing about things and people. I would have very vivid dreams about life, truth dreams, and I still do to this day. One day when Kieran was about one years old, he was in his pushchair, and we were walking past the local secondary school, and I was looking at the children in their school uniforms, thinking that would be Kieran one day, when I heard a very clear voice that said in my mind ‘ You will not send him to that school, you have to make sure you get him educated, because he is a very clever child’, I wasn’t afraid, and I knew what I was being told was the truth. I always believed there was a spirit world, I didn’t know where that belief came from, I just knew it was true.

I never forgot what that voice said to me that day. As Kieran got older, it was very apparent that he was a very intelligent boy, and I knew despite the fact that we didn’t have much money, I would do everything I could for him to make sure he got an education. I knew some of the choices I would make over the coming years would not be popular, but they were decisions that were heart based, and were made using my intuition and my inner knowing. It was first time in my life that I really trusted myself, but I believed in the guidance I was given, and I never faulted in believing in that guidance. As I have reflected on that moment many times over my life, I see that moment, when I heard that voice, as a pivotal point in my life to remembering who I was, and why I came to this world. And I would hear that voice again, many times when important decisions were to be made.

About four years after hearing the voice, I went on a walking holiday to the Lake District. It was a guided walking holiday for a week, six days were walking days, and one rest day. On the rest day, I got dropped off for the day in a town called Keswick. Such a lovely town, with a lovely energy. I wondered around, exploring, and chatting to people. I found my way to this beautiful park, called Hope Park, and there I sat on a bench, just relaxing and taking in my surroundings. As I was relaxing, and enjoying the sun on my face, I heard the voice again, ‘This is the place to bring up your son, you must move here’. I didn’t know anything about Keswick, but as I sat on that bench, I knew this was the place, and I again trusted the guidance I was given. When I returned home from my walking holiday, I told Kieran about Keswick, and told him that one day we would move there. Over the coming years Kieran and I had many trips to Keswick. I gathered as much information as I could about the town, and I was really happy to find out that the town had an excellent Secondary School. So with that in mind, the plan was that Kieran and I would move to Keswick before Kieran started Secondary School, and that is exactly what we did. On September 26th 1999, we moved to Keswick. I didn’t know the profound affect that move would have on my life and on Kieran’s life. I would at last remember why I was here, and Kieran at age 10 would make a decision about his life that would confirm why the voice told me to move to Keswick with him……………..

Walking in Keswick